20 Weeks

This week the baby is the size of a small cantaloupe and my belly looks like the size of a melon! He is about 6 and half inches crown to rump and weighs about 10 ounces and our little boy has been busy growing his boy parts. If you were to stretch him out he would be about as long as a banana (head to heel). There is still plenty of room for him in my womb which means plenty of space for twisting, turning, punching, and even somersaulting or what I like to call a "dance party" because that is what it feels like! He is also swallowing more these days, which is good practice for his digestive system. He's producing meconium, a black, sticky by-product of the digestive system which will make up his first couple of dirty diapers. Interestingly, the baby has established sleeping patterns akin to a newborn and may even have a favorite sleeping position already. At this point in the pregnancy the baby is putting most of his energy into gaining weight so he can be fat and happy at birth (but no more than 9 pounds please!).

This baby has been active for weeks but I've been the only one able to feel it. After long spans of resting with my hand on my belly I have felt a kick or two from the outside, but finally a few nights ago Jake was able to feel a couple of kicks from our little soccer player! It was so exciting and so what I needed after a miserable day at work. I think it was very eye opening to Jake and it was a fun and exciting moment. We're still working on names and when we do come up with it, I am leaning towards keeping it to ourselves (don't hate me!). We have our official OB ultrasound today and I can't wait to see him! I actually haven't taken a peek myself in about 3 weeks so I am sure he has grown to be quite big! Our little guy seems to be more active in the afternoon and evening, but I don't know if this is because I am more settled down at this time of day and have more time to recognize his movements or if he really is just more active then.

I am loving every bit of pregnancy so far and it has been a pretty smooth ride, like I have said I am very thankful for it. When I first noticed my belly ripening and my body changing I was quick to believe it was temporary, but I know better than that. In pregnancy your body keeps changing everyday and I remind myself of the progress it means for the baby and I am usually happy with that. But then I go through the miserable process of trying on a dozen different maternity swimming suits (and even non-maternity suits in desperation) and the self esteem just goes down the drain! Thankfully in the last 20 weeks I can say I have only had a few of these moments, but pregnant or not body image is a battle for most women I know.

Ok, off my soap box and on to another (and I apologize for the melancholy). My baby is getting closer and closer to reaching the point of viability(about 23 weeks). Even at the point of viability there are no guarantees of a healthy baby, a scenario my job makes me all too familiar with. I know those in my family and dear friends who have pregnancy stories that end with the pregnancy and don't go on to be baby stories. I just want to take a moment and recognize those people. I know there is nothing you can say to comfort someone over the loss of a child, and it is always the loss of a child no matter what stage of pregnancy you are in, but this week my heart has been heavy thinking about these families.

How very softly you tiptoed into our world, almost silently, only a moment you stayed. But what an imprint your footsteps have left upon our hearts